Revelations

OMG. Tomorrow is really Monday! I can't wait. I mean, I can't fucking wait. I get to get up way too early, get dressed, pack a lunch, and drive for half an hour to work. When I get there, I will be bombarded by rudeness, ugly people, and plenty of poorly dressed nit-wits. Then I can top it off by attempting to find a copy machine that actually works! Imagine that! I can't fucking wait. It is just too exciting. I can't sit still. Maybe a vibrator would calm me down. Hmm...Oh and I have a meeting after school too. That means I get to stay an extra hour and a half. Wow! I am too fucking nice to these people. Don't you want my life? I mean really...it is that great. I am feeling overjoyed at the moment. I want to scream from the rooftops HAPPY MONDAY TO ALL MY BITCHES, I MEAN MY PEEPS!
Is there a question you would like to ask me? The answer is no I am not drinking before work or at lunch and no I am not taking Prozac (Does anyone have some freebies? I wouldn't mind taking a few here and there.). This is simply the new me. Nothing will stand in my way. I am going to make 50 cents an hour, be verbally abused by someone, and STILL I will be happy. I will smile. I will love life because at the end of the day...work doesn't matter. My family matters. My friends matter. My health matters. Fuck the rest of it!

*In regard to my previous post, let me be clear. I will wear the top half of the outfit if my nether region is properly waxed. I have been really lazy for like a year now, except during swimsuit season, but that has passed. However, if it isn't groomed in the shape of a pumpkin (for the season of course), then I will wear the bottom half instead. I am REALLY flexible!
Can you hear me Bitches?
HAPPY FUCKING MONDAY!